Spike's Winter Wonderland
by: Highlander II
Rating: PG-13: language
Spoilers: None
Summary: Spike's being harassed by those carolers again, this time it's "Winter Wonderland"
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Joss Whedon and are property of Kuzui/Kuzui Entertainment, Mutant Enemy Productions, WB, UPN, FOX etc. etc.
Feedback: Highlander II
Sleigh bells ring, are you listening. In the lane, snow is glistening...
Oh bollocks! They're back.
A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight...
Thought I'd gotten rid of you lot last year. Now we have this Winter Wonderland crap?
Walking in a winter wonderland.
See.
Gone away is the bluebird...
Because I ate it.
Here to stay is a new bird...
Is it that Fred chippie? She's cute.
He sings a love song...
Fred's a girl, you nits.
As we go along...
Yeah yeah. Walkin' in a winter wonderland. Don't you know it doesn't snow in LA?
In the meadow we can build a snowman...
Snowman? Meadow? You gits are confused. Haven't seen snow in LA... well... ever. And meadows? This isn't Green Acres. Gotta travel bloody far just to find grass in this town.
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown...
Who the bleeding hell is Parson Brown?
He'll say: Are you married?
Imaginin' the snowman talks? Ya'll are off your bird or something.
We'll say: No man. But you can do the job while you're in town...
You're talking back? And people said I was crazy talkin' to things they couldn't see.
Later on, we'll conspire...
This shows promise.
As we dream by the fire...
Knew it was too good to last.
To face, unafraid, the plans that we've made...
Oh bugger...
Walking in a winter wonderland.
Is this song over yet? The last one was at least tasty.
In the meadow we can build a snowman...
Haven't we already done this?
And pretend that he's a circus clown...
What next? A little snow car and more snow clowns pouring out? Bloo-oody hell.
We'll have lots of fun with Mister Snowman...
*Shakes head* I am so scared by this song now...
Until all the kids knock him down...
Hoo yah! Now that sounds like fun! I like this part. Can I help?
When it snows...
*snort*
Ain't it thrilling...
Uh, no.
Though your nose gets a chilling...
'Nose gets a chilling'? Is this for real? What the bleeding hell? Oh sod it, I give up.
We'll frolic and play, the Eskimo way...
Oh dear...
Walking in a winter wonderland
Please, please, be done.
Walking in a winter wonderland
Bugger all! Stop sodding singing!
Walking in a winter wonderland
You have to be done now... because I'm going to do the world a favor and get rid of the singers! Just like last year... run! Run! Run!
Bollocks. Sodding Christmas.
End
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